I’m pretty sure I was born a hopeless romantic. It made me sad to see anything alone. Every night I lined my bed with my stuffed animals, and if one fell out, I couldn’t rest until it was snuggled up with the others. I just knew it would be scared and lonely on the floor.
This is a photo of me and my cousin after raiding my aunt’s dress-up bin. Love my wig with the Detroit Tigers hat!
When I went off to Kindergarten, I found my people. Sure, a lot of the girls were into bossing the other kids or playing kickball with the boys, but a few of us were dreamers. I gravitated toward the brave souls who roped boys into playing house. I would gladly be the dog to play house with them! (Looking back, I think I WAS the dog! Ha!)
I still remember my crush. He did not know I was alive. I was the quiet girl with big, sparkling eyes and a constant smile. His name was John, and he had a confident way about him. And he was cute. He reminded me of the million-and-one males in my life. Both my parents came from large families.
Even at five years old, I knew John was out of my league. He occasionally chatted with the girl who had long, dark hair pulled back in pigtails. She wore cute jumpers and tights. She didn’t chew the cords of her hood. She wasn’t afraid to talk to him either. She was put together and oozed confidence.
I really didn’t give a rip about my appearance. Sure, I liked dressing up for Christmas and Easter, but that was about it. I liked splashing in mud puddles with bare feet, finding pet worms, wheeling my kitty around in a plastic toy grocery cart. I chased my favorite cousins around my grandpa’s farm and hung out with the two closest to my age, both boys. But I could be feminine, too. It would take a few years for me to climb out from the shadows and unleash my exuberance, but when I did, it refused to be contained again.
They’re important. Little five-year-olds grasp so much more than we give them credit for. My crush taught me this: a. I wanted the cute boy to notice me, and b. I wasn’t going to put up with being invisible my whole life.
I don’t know where John is now. I only spent two years at that school. But I’m thankful for the dreamer side of me. Here’s to all the Kindergarten crushes!
Did you have a crush in grade school?
Have a terrific day!!