What Doesn’t Kill You, Will Make You Stronger – How To Make Success From Rejection

Whoever came up with this phrase, might not have thought it all of the way through. Okay, so I admit that sometimes our trials make us stronger, but let’s analyze this theory for a moment.

Case In Point:

*If I Get Hit By A Car And Don’t Die I will get stronger?

*If I ran five miles and lay down on the concrete gasping for breath, I will get stronger?

*If I get a medical diagnosis that forecasts chronic pain, I will get stronger?

*If I survive a hurricane, but am confined to a wheelchair the rest of my life, I will get stronger?

*If I get ten rejection letters for the same manuscript, I will get stronger?


The answer to all of these questions is yes. Now, hold on a minute you say. Getting hit by a car will make me stronger?

Physcially? No.

Character Growth? Yes.

Sometimes we focus so much on the physical aspects of strength, or the skill aspects of strength as a writer. Think for a moment about Olympians. They can be the best trained, most skilled athlete in the world, but if they can’t control their emotions and have integrity in the game, they won’t win.

As writers we want to rush across the finish line to publication because after all, we are talented, hard working, story writers. But are we ready to be Olympians?

Once your books are in print your skin must grow thicker to handle reader reviews, your discipline must be greater to meet your deadlines, and your integrity must guide you to make the best decisions.

How To Make Success From Rejection: 

*Let yourself grieve with full knowledge that it comes with the territory. Take a day to feel sad, but make sure you don’t blame your rejection on everyone around you or the source of the feedback.

*Take The Good From The Feedback First And Last. When you get mixed feedback, start by recognizing the good and end with recognizing the good. It will allow you to focus on the whole project. Keeping in mind that your project isn’t a total loss will go a long way toward picking yourself back up again.

*Identify The Part of the Feedback that You Can Apply To Improve. Just pick a few things to work on from what you’ve been given.

*Recognize that Battle Scars Are Badges of Courage. Change your mind set. Keep your rejection letters in a binder or folder. Someday you will look back and see how far you’ve come and the sacrifices you made for something you can be proud of.

*Remember that each rejection brings you one rejection closer to success! Rejection means you put yourself out there and learned something new. That new knowledge or even just the courage brings you closer to finding success the next time.

Have a rejection story in writing or life you’d like to share? OR What do you do to turn your rejections into sucess?


About Michelle Lim

Author Michelle Lim is the Brainstorming/Huddle Coach with My Book Therapy Press and the Midwest Zone Director for American Christian Fiction Writers. Michelle’s romantic suspense is represented by Karen Solem of Spencillhill Associates and has gained contest recognition in the Frasier, the Genesis, and the Phoenix Rattler, winning the Genesis in 2015 for her genre. Michelle writes devotionals for The Christian Pulse Online Magazine and Putting On The New. Since her nonfiction book release, Idea Sparking: How To Brainstorm Conflict In Your Novel, through public speaking and online chats Michelle helps writers discover the revolutionary power of brainstorming to bring new life to their stories.

4 thoughts on “What Doesn’t Kill You, Will Make You Stronger – How To Make Success From Rejection

  1. dtopliff says:

    Thanks for excellent and encouraging content.

  2. It’s funny, but the very first thing I ever wrote was published in Woman’s World. Which is good…but did not prepare me for the rejections that followed. And follow they did. lol.

    I try to learn something from my rejections (after I get through licking my wounds), even when I don’t agree. Like in a contest. I might not agree with the comments or score, but realize if that person had a problem with the story, so would other readers. So I try to address the problem they had, but keep the changes in my voice. Not sure if that makes sense.

  3. Michelle Lim says:

    Your right, Pat! It is so important to keep your voice through the edits. Still we have to learn as you have from those critiques, painful though it is.

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